Learning to acknowledge the goodness within yourself
Have you ever thought of life as progressing in the shape of an upward spiral, where we circle back in periodic cycles to encounter old issues from a different, perhaps higher and wiser, perspective?
A while ago, I revisited an old issue but met it again as if I was seeing it for the first time. As I encountered it, I felt astounded by the realization--again--of how much of my life unfolded as a reaction to others' expectations of me.
What was new this time was the "how much" part. The extent of my reactionary life became clearer to me. Sometimes my reaction was to please and do what was expected. Other times, I'd do just the opposite to assert my independence or to rebel. Either way, instead of aligning myself with my deepest, truest desires, my path in life zigzagged along like a ball on a pool table, bouncing from one contact after another.
Living authentically, maximizing personal freedom, and demonstrating integrity (all foundational to happiness and fulfillment) must begin with self-examination and self-determination. In fact, life is the practice of honoring and manifesting our deepest desires one choice at a time. By first learning what our desires are. By persevering despite obstacles. By correcting our path when we go astray. And finally, by acknowledging our role in its positive outcome so that we can own our lives as an honest expression of ourselves rather than a haphazard jumble of circumstances.
Today's newsletter explores how to use energy medicine techniques to powerfully support this process.
Owning Your Life
Using energy medicine techniques for self-acknowledgment
Recently, someone asked me a very good question: "Why can't you own your life?"
He added, "You have a unique psychiatric practice, free time, financial security, and creative opportunities that few have. You have a good life!"
Why, indeed! Perhaps because my life felt so accidentally created. Perhaps my experiences had instilled in me a victim mentality that now seems at odds with its positive outcome. His question pointed out the irony that despite having a good life, I had difficulty accepting it as my own, continuing to believe that despite all my efforts to forge an authentic life, external social forces had forced me to have a different life than the one I truly wanted.
Perhaps when I was young, things were so. But not anymore. Somehow, along the way, through a million different choices, I had wrestled with life's circumstances and transformed it into something else, something personally fulfilling. His question forced me to take a look at myself and realize that.
During the same week, a very dear friend visited me for support on a (surprisingly) similar problem. There is no better motivator for me to do the work on my own issues than having Life present it as an opportunity to help a friend. When I saw and heard her, I saw and heard myself. As she shared some of the challenges in her life, we came up with some Logosynthesis statements to heal her distress.
Here is the Logosynthesis technique:
“I now retrieve all of my energy bound up in the/this (feeling/belief/negative fantasy about ....X) and I bring this energy back to the rightful place within myself.”
“I now remove all non-me energy bound up in the/this (same issue as the first sentence), I remove this non-me energy from all of my body, being, and personal space, and I send this energy back to where it truly belongs.”
“I now retrieve all of my energy bound up in all of my reactions to the/this (same issue as the first sentence) and I bring this energy back to the rightful place within myself.”
Here are the statements I created for her (me) to address the problems:
All the parts of my life that continue to be a reaction to other people’s expectations of me.
Difficulty allowing myself to do/be aware of/receive all that is aligned with my deepest, truest desires.
Belief that I’ve got to prove myself, but not too much.
Belief that if I achieve too much people will be mad and jealous of me and attack me.
We also turned some statements around to their positive versions and created some EET statements:
EET: I now choose to align myself with Life Energy and be empowered to:
Allow myself to do/be aware of/receive all that is aligned with my deepest, truest desires.
The next day, she texted me to tell me that she's been feeling better. Me too!
Life is an ongoing journey of growth and learning. Often we are gifted with friends who show us those parts of ourselves that need healing, like mirrors reflecting our own souls. Sometimes we are blessed with mentors who ask us good questions. I feel grateful for my friends and mentors, the opportunities to serve, and the gifts of healing I receive in the process.
We are all creators invited by Life to its sandbox--to make something out of the raw materials of life. Supporting my friend's ability to follow her deepest desires and to own her achievements regardless of others' reactions helped me to do the same. By recognizing the goodness within, rather than emphasizing the obstacles without, I found the source of power that had transformed the lives we didn't want, into lives we could call our own.
I hope that sharing these personal reflections will help you to acknowledge the power within you that helped you to create a good life and to own it.